It was dark outside when Donald answere the door. She had said she would be there at 6 o clock but now it was more like 9.00. She was thirsty and asked if she could use the toilet

For a moment he thought she might be angry with him for closing the door in her face. But she didn't seem quite as psychotic as most of the people he'd met latelty so he bought her a drink.

Donald made a living nowadays as a service attendant at Burger King

.............

She spent days trailing around after him, collecting video footage for her net site and listening to stories about the time Shiela Tequilla and he had "been too much for Naples".

The pantomime developed loosely around the tale of Cinderella. Donald was Donald, the Prince was a sleazy geezer, the Sista a dominatrix and Buttons a bitchy gossip

It all went well until the night of the performance, when, after drinking the free vodka, Donald invited a man to his hotel and got robbed

She got pissed and fell out with the bouncer in the hotel disco

and the hotel fire alarm went off at 5.00am in the morning. They all looked dog rough, except for Donald who had matching blue cotton Pyjamas.

They never found out "who done it" but they all lived hapily ever after